I was watching DVDs of I Love Lucy ( as an aside, it's still side-splittingly funny all these years later and it's only now that I realise what a terrific actress Lucille Ball was) yesterday and there was this truly hilarious episode, in which Lucy is expecting so Ricky decides to pamper her by making her breakfast in bed. Only, he can't find anything he needs and has her running in and out of the kitchen constantly to help him. Eventually he turns out a waffle that could have fired a steam engine, and she tells him not to cook her breakfast, because, "I'm just not strong enough."
That led me to remember all the episodes of my husband in the kitchen. Before we got married, I made a deal with him. I'm just not a morning person and my eyes don't pop open without tea, so morning tea was going to be his responsibility - and that's one thing he managed quite well. I'm vegetarian and don't plan on cooking meat, so the other deal was that any non-veg in the house would be his to make.
While we were students in France, he once decided to make a chicken curry for our dinner guests. He considerately asked me to retire to the bedroom while he took over the kitchen ( our flat only had 2 rooms) so I wouldn't be grossed out by the sights. He had got a recipe from my mother-in-law.
About five minutes into cooking, he came running in, "Which is laung?" I had to find it for him.
Then, "Which is jeera?" I would up laying out all the spices for him and went back in.
A few minutes further and he came in to lie down because chopping the onions had stung his eyes so badly. Then one more into the fray went Horatio.
"Is this too dark?" The first batch of roasted spices had to be thrown away and the windows of the apartment flung open in deep winter, because he roasted them till they were cremated and the apartment filled with smoke. If we'd had a smoke detector, it would have had a busy day!
Then later, "How brown is brown?" He was bhunoing ( slow-cooking) the onion-garlic-ginger masala for the dish and didn't know whether he should try for a chocolatey brown colour or a sand colour!
Of course, after all his efforts, eventually the dish did turn out delicious and he was beseiged with compliments. However, since then, he hasn't felt the least yearning to head back into the kitchen!